not safe, but good.

i recently listened to a little snippet by Derek Webb about the Gospel. in it, he brought up an excellent reminder of one of the attributes of God. he discussed C.S. Lewis' character of Aslan, the lion from the allegory The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe. how powerful of a statement he makes about just how wild and untamed God is. God is like a lion; He can't be contained or fit into whatever paradigm we want. one of the biggest flaws in Christianity today is that we have created this watered down and safe version of who God is.

i am learning more and more that God is unpredictable. the kind of life that He has called us to live as Christians is not guaranteed to be easy. how fast we fall into the trap of devoting our time and passion to things that aren't as risky and that give instant gratification. i am often quite guilty of ignoring those aspects of the Gospel that i'm afraid of or that could make my life complicated, but what will come from taking those steps of faith is much more than i can even possibly imagine.

because though God is not safe, He is so, so good.

teenage love?

seriously, why is this dude loved so passionately by hoards of teens all over the world? i mean, he's pasty white, way too serious, a bit of a creep and not to mention, a VAMPIRE and not REAL.

sorry, girls. i think i'll stick to the one i was smitten with in my teenage years.

much better, right?

get out of the box and step into the clear.

truth: i, for many years, have kept myself trapped in a little box. i have a pretty warped perception of myself that comes from the way i have always felt that my personality determines i should be. because i was "quiet" growing up, i saw myself as boring. i stayed in that little box in order to protect myself from getting hurt by those who might not find me interesting or fun. in turn, my actions led to others putting me in a box of their own. it became a vicious cycle of frustration and irritation, one that seemed completely impossible to escape from.

just in the last year or so, i have finally allowed myself to be myself, who i really am, and not much else. of course, remnants of those urges to hide my quirks still remain. i am still leery of what others' judgement of me may be and at times that prevents me from doing things that i would definitely do otherwise. but, i would say, 99.9% (ok, maybe just 97%) of the time, i make the choices i think are best for me.

the most recent episode of ugly betty touched on this topic, and i totally identified with betty. first off, i think ugly betty deserves more acclaim as a tv show for it's perfect mix of the most hilarious and the serious aspects of life. secondly, way to go betty for being totally weird and spunky! i love it. anyway, on the last episode, betty was feeling trapped in her own little box, created by her own view of herself and the opinions of her family. but betty, being resilient as she is, smashed that box and helped to remove some of her own hesitations about herself. it was such a great reminder for me.

betty = awesome.

tomorrow is the day.

there is one non-bearded man whose music i particularly adore: john mayer, also lovingly referred to as johnny. my love affair with johnny has been a long lasting one, going all the way back to my senior year in high school. his music never fails to speak to my soul. it's like the soundtrack to my adult life.

who was there to console me when i hated college? john.
who opened my ears to the sweet sounds of acoustic guitar? john.
who helped to build my love of concerts and live music? john.
who gets the introspective wheels in my head turning? john.

tomorrow his newest album, battle studies, will be immediately downloaded to my computer and put on repeat. not to mention, the countdown to march, when i will see john from second row seats, will begin.

call me crazy, but in my life there are just some things that are staples: jesus, the Gap and, yes, john.

the way of the beard.

i can't lie: it's hard for me to resist a man with a beard. it's a surefire attraction for me. i think this affinity for beards also carries over into my musical taste. i had never thought about this before, until an article on NPR.com brought this brilliant parallel to my mind. the kind of music i like is typically made by men with beards: ray lamontagne, bon iver, iron & wine; they are all bearded and exceptional artists.

though the author of the article prefers a different, less pleasant and more wild, form of rock music, i find myself on the other end of the argument. i'll take a pensive and whispery song any day over insipid lyrics screamed through the speakers by a pretentious rock star. the bearded men are rock stars in their own right, without even having to try.

i say, if music is going the way of the beard, count me in.

bad little blogger.

i haven't posted much lately. in addition to a bout of extreme laziness, several things have been hindrances to my updating:

1. clinic
2. studying
3. sleep

however, now that my midterm is over, i shall return to the world of blogging. but not until after a much anticipated road trip to St. Louis, where adventures of the extended family, Gateway Arch and Joshua Radin sort will be had. bring it on, St. Louis.